...Triggers..

sometimes outta the blue .. im triggered.. simply as a smell.. an action.. a reminder.. the walking into a room..it doesnt matter sometimes.. just a simple word can trigger me.. im learning to control myself...but sometimes the easiest thing to do is shut it down.. and wait for the trance to be over.. ride the wave.. and sometimes that reqiures space.. and allowance to do so.. i understand myself and my limits on certien things.. im learning my boundries.. and i stand outside of them sometimes.. but they are due to change at any moment.. i notice that when im in a sway my boundry are larger then normal.. and when i feel like i am safe inside my own self.. the boundry get smaller and easior to allow into my surroundings.. but i do push out.. and move you back a bit when my boundries are high.. if you have an issue with that.. take it up with me after i am done the sway.. when my mind is clear and i can see beyond thy sway more easily.. because when i am in this state my defenses are high, easily reactive. i know myself enough to ask for space. its up to you to respect that.. or simply..turn and walkaway.. im in a state of pissyness..