....not here today...gone somewhere else...

I feel a little distant today.. five months to the day.. i know that i am surrounded by love and that i am safe.. but this day is really hard and im kinda distant.. side tracked..mind is somewhere else.. disassoicated.. mind space ... and it has done itself! i have no control over how distant i have become.. in the last 24hours.. i instantly dettach myself from this day...cuz i go into my state of recalling..had alot of talking about syris today...with beautiful reward and papa and boychild...brought up a memory.. but the most heartful journey was with beautiful reward.. it was important to have the conversation with her.. to see where she was in her healing process about the whole situation.. she is remarkable.. such a trooper.. i love her.. <3 .. im not gonna get into it though..sighs..--- *reached out for support* ---
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-->I am thankful for the support i have around me.. and the love that they show me...i feel extremely blessed to be surrounded by such awesome people.. From Wifey to Dawnzy to Sir.Bear.. to Michael...to Perky to..family im glad i have surrounded myself with such understanding and amazing people.. greatful for everyone of you .... i feel alittle more presant. <3 <--