sometimes the downs outrun the ups

A wise man once said to me, that you have to remove your own shoes before putting your feet in someone elses., and i have always lived by that example..

so here..

takes off my shoes..

i dont understand how things got so horrible, so upsetting. but here is some background so you understand where i am coming from...

I gave birth to a beautiful Reward and she was the light of my life the only white light in my world, her father, isnt the most easy person to get along with, but he was decent, well we couldnt live together but we could co parent, but now that his horrible monster is in his life, he doesnt see anything, just what she says to him, i seriously think that she is just Evil. and theres no way to change her mind about the way that she effects my child, how she talks to her, how she convinced her that i was a horrible mother and that i didnt love my child anymore, or how the fact that she TORMENTS her to the point that she messes herself and shes six, knows where the bath room is, she screams and tantrums since the first day that she met the evilness, my child constantly tells me that she doesnt want to go back there, but because of the courts there is no way that i can take her away from that, i feel like they treat her as a money symbol and use her for a personal attack against me. she is a human a child a innocent beauty, but they mute her, they dont hear what she says. and how do you give her voice back.

my child was a free spirit that could laugh smile and accept people for who they are, now shes quiet, sad and wrapped inside her own world, i feel like they are robbing my daughter of her own childhood and placing her in a box that she cant even open, i want to open her up again show her that things arent always going to be so hard. so displacent, so confusing, so upsetting, it hurts my heart that they have taken such a beautiful child and placed her in this darkness, as i said shes six, she should be allowed to shine.

I found this lovely beautiful sad picture on the internet. the stunning message in this picture : sadness can overwelm the smallest. and Failure..and demise. overcomes even the smallest bit of happiness.